Healthy Grieving Bootcamp: Step 3
We all try to fill our lives with love, happiness, and success. The things that bring us the most pleasure are things we chase and try to hold onto. But when life steals our joy, it can leave us feeling sad, empty, and incomplete. Who or what do you turn to when everything you’ve tried fails?
Giving Your Life to God
A lot of the things that attract us comes from subconscious patterns that are formed by past relationships or childhood experiences. So even when we want healthy love, we may choose people who trigger old wounds instead of healing them.
The intense spark that feels like instant love usually is not permanent. Two good people can meet at the wrong time. One may not be healed, ready, or emotionally available. And sometimes fear gets in the way on both sides.
- Fear of being hurt → people hold back
- Fear of losing someone → people overgive or abandon themselves
- Fear of vulnerability → people avoid depth
So even when love shows up, fear quietly ruins it.
Without healing, people repeat cycles. It will be with a different person, but the same story. Love isn’t stationary, so, both people must be willing to grow together or the relationship will come to an end. Have you given up on love?
My Battle With Giving My Life to God
Ever since I was a young adult, I dreamed of finding my soulmate to share my life with. So, I committed to one relationship after another, hoping to find the perfect one to create my ideal family. Each time, I gave my partners my all and put up with many things I should not have for fear of being alone. Here’s an example:
At the end of my fifth long-term relationship, I realized that true love was not in my cards, and I gave up on the fairy tale of happily ever after. And I seriously thought about giving my life to God, so that I could be happy and find purpose.
Healn’ By Giving My Life to God
Over the years, replacing one person with another left me with a lot of emotional baggage and an exhausted outlook. Therefore, I decided to take a different approach and find the love within that I heard so much about because I never wanted to rely on someone else to make me happy again!
Early in life, I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord & Savior, hoping to live a good life of service and commitment. But as I grew older, I became addicted to human affection and strayed from my path. After several endings with lovers, I gave up on other people and chose to find out how I could do myself.
To begin my venture of self-healing, I decided to lean on the divine to make me whole, and I turned my will and life over to God. I made a few bold and risky decisions to find God that made my family, friends, and my ‘sane self’ question my mental stability. Yet, deep down, I felt confident in my judgment and sensed there was no other way for me to become complete. I couldn’t go wrong allowing my Creator to rehabilitate me, right?
This is what I did:
- I quit my job as an educator.
I was too depressed and irritated to do anything. My responsibilities at work became overwhelming; I could not eat or sleep regularly, and it wasn’t easy to engage positively with my students and the staff.
2. Rented Out My Home
Because I no longer had a steady paycheck, I couldn’t afford to pay the mortgage. So, I found a responsible renter to take over the payments to preserve my credit standing. Guess what? The first name of my tenant just happened to be the same as the street address of my house. Was that a coincidence or a sign?
3. I moved to Florida
I hosted a yard sale, sold all my belongings except for a few clothing items, and then relocated 900 miles away without a job, housing, or family.
4. I Purchased An RV And Became Friends With The Spirits Of The Sky
I cashed in my retirement and purchased a 31-foot Wildcat 5th Wheel. From there, I found a peaceful, friendly RV community to nestle down and reset my life. Guess what else? The RV salesman’s last name just happened to be the same as the street address of my home, also! Was that another coincidence or a sign?
When I finally settled into my new way of living, I began to pray, meditate, read the books/stories in the Bible, and explore ways to be more spiritual in hopes of connecting with my Lord and Savior.
For Your Healn’
Life can be complicated at times, causing us to feel broken and hopeless! We need to understand that there are situations the universe throws at us so we can learn lessons, and then there’s the mess we create due to our ignorance and fears. Regardless of our troubles, we must be strong enough to seek self-improvement. The road to recovery must begin somewhere!
Transformation is necessary during our soul’s journey to becoming ‘whole.’ However, it is an individual assignment. We grow from the inside out! As a reward for the lone hard work, peace, and true happiness will become a part of your daily life. By giving your life to God, you will witness that God’s love truly heals!
You don’t have to do the same things I did, but consider giving your life to God and commit to the process. Be courageous and accept the mission of your soul. You owe it to yourself!
Giving your life to God isn’t about becoming perfect overnight or following a long list of rules. It’s about a real relationship… a decision to trust Him, surrender control, and let Him lead you.
- Let go of trying to control everything. Go with the flow.
- Trust Him with your life, your pain, your future.
- Choose to follow Him daily—not just in words, but in how you live.
It’s less about religion… and more about surrender & relationship.
How To Do It:
- Just talk to Him and be honest. You can say:
- “I’m tired of living life my way.”
- “I need you.”
- “I don’t have it all together, but I want You in my life.”
2. Believe He wants you.
- God isn’t waiting for you to clean yourself up first.
- Look at John 3:16 — it shows that His love comes before your perfection.
3. Accept Jesus. This is the foundation of Christian Faith.
- Jesus isn’t just a teacher. He’s the one who reconnects you to God.
- You could say – “Jesus, I believe in You. I want You in my life. I give You my heart.”
4. Surrender. This is where it becomes real.
- Giving Him your pain.
- Your past.
- Your relationships.
- Your plans.
Not all at once, but day by day.
5. Start walking with Him daily. This is how your relationship grows.
- Pray (just talk to Him).
- Read the Bible (start simple, like the book of Psalms or Matthew).
- Ask Him for guidance in your decisions.
Giving your life to God doesn’t mean life becomes easy or you never struggle again. But it does mean, you are not alone anymore, you will gain peace that grows over time, and you begin to heal from the inside out.
Continue Your Healn’ Journey
- The next step of your healing journey is Step 4:
- Review Step 2: 7 Signs You’re Still Stuck on a Past Love (And How to Let Go)
- The Heartbreak Tour – A 7-article series showing how I, personally, experienced depression and the stages of grieving loss.
- Join our She Healn’ Community for support, journaling prompts, and guidance.
